Sloppy SOP

Statement Of Purpose.
First things first.Here is the statement of purpose for this post.
The purpose of this post is to share my woes over penning down the Statement of Purpose for an application to a college of business education.woops! did I make make a statement out of the word purpose;).
okei okei Am all set to pen down on the papyrus an inimitable SOP-The statement of my purpose.Phew! lets go !has to be a bombastic one.The opening sentence could not have been more disastrous than the one i wrote first .here it goes "If u were to describe me in a word.."well wait wait! this sentence is gramatically, conceptually and morally flawed.Coz u dont
decsribe in a word... its in brief that u use a word..and that is no description watsoever.Next conceptually ytf do u think some1 reading ur SOP , with 100% probabaility of he not knowing you forget knowing u well enuff to describe, would want to desrcibe u.Next morally okei lets leave that part it would get too boring..i dont want to ennervate away with such trivia ;)Ditched that sentence undoubtedly;)Later.. had this urge to put this in quotes n bold like this...
"A vivacious enthusiast.
That ,would be my epithet."
howzzat?? oh cum u r not contesting in a peotry competition right?
Well i can exhaust the whole lexicon with all unwanted jargonary, but that would avail no fruition and that of course would be a trite(As most many of us land up writing it that way;)).
So how abt this?
The spectrum of light has jus 7 colors but my spectra of interests 1,2...7,8...oh boy!hehe cant even count...ouch! I am sure i will not write nythin funny(??!! looks more atrotious than funny though;)) Actually can go on n on with a rote endlessly to bore whomsoever concerned to death.Or I had another choice ,to dissimulate absolute decency and vitirolically say somethin like '....to the best institue under the sun here comes my application.It would be a fete to be associated with a college of such high caliber'(hopin it has one !) .Or take a militant approach to my resume and do all i can to save my image bein marred.At the end of the rough draft i realsied that i had proposed to the reader an antithesis of my bein ,nigglin around the ramified persona that i described myself as .Finally i allayed myself sayin a rampant canvassin would not fetch me a seat there .Then made a wise decision of sayin thus.
The following state the purpose for which i shall be interested in pursuing my management studies at this renowned institue.
1.To b a leader,one with a class.
2.To make money
3.To make money fast
4.To make more money
5.To make much more...okei i am sure u got the idea of wat i wrote down;)
If some1 has survived thru this tortuous letter ,then they would definitely call me to compliment me with a watta impalpable piece of shit i have churned out for an SOP;) which actually has lost the substance n the actual purpose of this whole exercise .In the end the purpose or the reason simply happens to b the empty space of about 1.5 pages in the application form reserved solely for this purpose:)